


I have loved you since we were 18...

by Bellarkesdramione



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin Reunion, Bellarke, Childhood Friends, Cross-Posted on Wattpad, Endgame Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin, F/M, HEA, Old Friends to Lovers, Second Chances, They loved each other for years, but they were too nervous to admit it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-18 22:07:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29616129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bellarkesdramione/pseuds/Bellarkesdramione
Summary: The one where Bellamy and Clarke are old childhood best friends, and they reunite after years apart.
Relationships: Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin, background Monty Green/Harper McIntyre
Comments: 6
Kudos: 53





	I have loved you since we were 18...

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little one shot request I got over on my Wattpad that I wanted to transfer over here;) 
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

"God this exam is going to be the fucking death of me, Harp." Clarke groans as she slams her biology textbook shut with a loud bang. Med school is not as easy as her mother made it out to be. It's constant studying, test-taking, and even more studying.

Harper glances up from her own book and raises her brow at Clarke. "Sweetie, you knew what you were signing up for when you chose to become a doctor. I have no sympathy."

Clarke rolls her eyes at the girl, "Quite hypocritical of you, future nurse Harper."

Harper lets out a laugh at that and points her finger loosely at Clarke. "Hey, hey, the reason I can say that to you is _because_ I am a future nurse Harper. I expect the same treatment, nothing less."

Clarke throws her empty energy bar wrapper at Harper and the girls break out in laughter before Harper is slamming her book closed as well. "Okay, maybe you are onto something. We need to take a break."

Clarke hums, "I agree. What is it you have in mind?" Clarke asks.

"Well, Monty just told me this morning that this new kid just got transferred. They're both taking Professor Pike's class." Harper starts.

"Why is Monty taking another History course if he's not majoring in History? That Lil' overachiever." Clarke teases. Monty is literally the smartest in their friend group, always taking classes and pushing himself academically. Clarke doesn't know how he manages to have a social life with all the work he does.

Harper laughs, a small smile spreading across her face as she thinks of her boyfriend. "Yeah yeah. You know what Monty says. 'Grad school is about learning beyond your area of expertise. I am a scholar.'" The girls share a laugh at Monty's expense. "Anyways, he said he talked to the guy and that he's really cool, just moved here with his sister; doesn't have a lot of friends. So he wanted to know if we wanted to go meet him? They're gonna be at Mt. Weather in about an hour."

"Just him? Not the sister?" Clarke asks.

Harper shakes her head, "Nah, the sister is still in High school, she's gonna be with some people she met in class. So it'll be just us."

"That sounds really fun actually. Anything is better than this fucking textbook right now." Clarke laughs, as she stands up to walk over to her closet to find clothes to change into.

"Who knows, Clarke, maybe you two will hit it off." Harper winks.

Clarke groans loudly and sends a small glare in her friend's direction. "Harp, please stop trying to set me up. I have no time for dating right now."

"Clarke you're only saying that because you and Lexa broke up and you feel like you wasted the first two years of college, _and_ your last year of high school on her." Harper accuses.

"That is not true! I learned a lot from that relationship, no time was wasted and it ended on good terms. She's happy with Costia, and I'm happy for her. I just don't see myself getting into another relationship at this moment."

And it is true. Clarke and Lexa met when Clarke was in her senior year at the high school. Lexa was the cool college sophomore, with the hard exterior and pretty green eyes. They hit it off and went on a few dates before they became girlfriends. They lasted for three years until Lexa got accepted into a prestigious program, deciding that it was for the best if she and Clarke parted ways.

Clarke was sad for a while; after all, she did _love_ Lexa. But she knew it wouldn't have lasted in the long run. They had too many differences; they wanted different things. Lexa never wanted kids or a simple life. She wanted big extravagant things that Clarke just couldn't bring herself to want. So it really was for the best.

"Okay, I get that. But why prevent yourself from being happy if the opportunity presents itself?" Harper asks.

Clarke turns around after slipping on a cute pair of ripped jeans. "I'll tell you what. If I and this guy hit it off I won't be _opposed_ to the possibility of a date. But I'm not making any promises, okay?"

Harper smirked triumphantly and then hopped off the bed towards her own closet. "Now, should I wear the red dress or the pink one?"

* * *

Bellamy plops down on his couch in frustration. "I don't know, O. Are you sure you're going to be okay here if I leave?"

Octavia gives him a pointed look. "Bell I'm eighteen not five. Yes, I'll be fine."

Bellamy glares at his sister for a moment before he relents, taking a deep breath and heaving himself off the couch before making his way to the door.

"No funny business while I'm gone, Octavia. I mean it." He says and his sister waves her hand at him, gesturing for him to leave.

He walks over to his car and hops in, typing in the address that Monty gave him for the club. He isn't really the type to go out and party. He's always been one to sit on the couch watching a documentary or read a good book. There was just something in his gut telling him that it would be a good thing to go out tonight. He already got along with Monty fairly well, and there is nothing wrong with making a few friends. He moved back here because he wanted Octavia to have the life she deserved. After their mother died, it was the best he could do for her. They were always happy here. They had amazing friends, and the whole place was filled with opportunities for them to better themselves. He wanted Octavia to have that again, hell, he even wanted that for himself.

He pulls up to the club and blows a whistle out of his mouth when he sees how long the line is. Hopefully, Monty already secured them a spot in the line, otherwise, no one would be partying tonight. Bellamy walked up to the line of people, scanning it for the lanky boy. Once he sees him, he smiles and walks up to him.

"Hey man, thank god you got a spot in line, it would have been shit if we had to wait." Bellamy comments, moving the hair that the wind blew into his face out of the way.

Monty laughs, "We don't have to wait in line dude. My girlfriend and her best friend are already in there. Harper's cousin Monroe works here, so we get in ahead of the line all the time. I was just waiting for you."

Bellamy's eyebrows shoot to the top of his head, "Damn, that's lucky. It must be nice to have those kinds of connections."

Monty laughs, leading them towards their booth behind the curtain. "Yeah, it has its perks. Before we go inside I want to warn you. My girlfriend is definitely trying to set you up with her best friend. I want you to know that I had no part in this, and I apologize in advance for this."

Bellamy almost chokes on a cough. "Why is your girlfriend trying to set me up?"

Monty shrugs, "I think it's more so she's trying to set her best friend up with you. Clarke's been through some pretty shit relationships, and I speak highly of you. So I guess Harper figured you two would hit it off well enough."

Bellamy's heart stops. "Clarke?"

Monty nods slowly, "Yeah, do you know Clarke?"

Bellamy's mind takes him back to years ago when they first moved to Arkadia, and he was a six-year-old boy holding the weight of the world on his shoulders.

⋆⋆

_"Hi! Welcome to Mrs. Kane's class. What's your name?" A young girl with blue eyes and curly blonde hair asks him._

_Bellamy crosses his arms, "I don't want to talk to you, go away."_

_The blonde girl pouts and stomps away. Good. Bellamy doesn't want any friends. All he wants is to go home and take care of his baby sister. He doesn't want to be here._

_Suddenly, the flurry of blonde hair appears at his side again, this time with the class roster in hand. "Your name is Bellamy Blake." She comments._

_Bellamy looks up at her, "Hey that's not fair, I told you to leave me alone!" He shouts._

_The blonde narrows her eyes at him. "I don't like leaving people alone when they can have someone there for them. I can be your friend Bellamy Blake, you just have to stop being a brat."_

_Bellamy searches the girl's face for a moment before a smile crosses his face. He couldn't help it, this girl is funny. "Fine. What's your name?" He asked._

_"Clarke. Clarke Griffin."_

⋆⋆

_"Clarke, seriously I look ridiculous." Bellamy groans, pulling at the tie around his neck._

_Clarke swats his hands away, a glare on her face. "Shut up nerd, no you don't. It's a homecoming, you have to look good, and not like some homeless person."_

_Bellamy rolls his eyes, "That's offensive, Clarke."_

_Clarke grimaces, "Sorry. Look, you don't want Roma to look all pretty and you look bad. You both have to look good."_

_Bellamy pushes her hands away from the tie that she has already adjusted ten times in the last minute. "In all my fifteen years of life, I have never worn something so uncomfortable."_

_Clarke laughs, "Don't worry Bell, you'll get used to it." She disappears behind the dressing room curtain, and tries on a few dresses, complaining about how much she hates them all until he hears a little giggle from the room._

_"What?" He asks, still messing with the stupid tie around his neck._

_"I like this one. Wanna see?" She asks timidly._

_"Sure, hurry up Griffin I want to take this shit off--," He trails off when he sees his best friend walk out, clad in a midnight blue dress that makes her eyes pop and sparkle like they never have before._

_She looks at him nervously. "Is it okay? Or is it too much? I probably look so stupid right now, that's why you aren't saying anything."_

_Bellamy clears his throat. "No- you, uh, you look... you look beautiful." And she did. He always knew that Clarke was pretty. He knew the second he met her that she was. But this is different. He's never seen her quite like this before. She looks gorgeous, and he doesn't know how to tell his heart to stop beating so fast._

_A pink flush crawls up her cheeks, and she smiles, looking down at the floor. "Thanks... You think Finn will like this dress?" She asks._

_His smile fades. Finn. He never liked that piece of shit, but Clarke swoons every time he so much as looks at her. He doesn't understand why. He looks at Clarke all the time and she never looks at him like that. His stomach flips when he realizes he wants her to look at him like that._

_"Yeah Princess, he's gonna love it," Bellamy says, his cockiness seeping into his voice as he repeats the nickname that Finn calls her. He likes the way it sounds so much better coming from his mouth._

_Clarke rolls her eyes and shoves him slightly, and tingles run up Bellamy's arm at the contact. "Shut up, for that you're gonna buy me lunch."_

⋆⋆

_It's really fucking inconvenient for him to be realizing the fact that he's in love with his best friend on a day like today._

_Realizing it is far different from it starting. No, it started back when they were fifteen trying on clothes at the mall for their first homecoming dance. He knew the feelings were creeping upon him. What he didn't know, was how serious they were until he was standing in front of his mother, tears welling up in his eyes after she told him they are moving thousands of miles away from the girl of his dreams._

_It was as if he had a bucket of ice-cold water drop onto his head at that moment. He was leaving Clarke, and she didn't know how much he loved her._

_He didn't say a word to his mother, only ran. Ran blocks until he was standing in front of Clarke's door, drenched from the rain. He knocked and waited for her to answer._

_Her laughter flowed from behind the door, until she opened it, standing in front of him in only a pair of socks, and an old T-shirt that rested just above her knees. His mouth went try at the sight._

_"Bell, what are you doing here?" She asked, her eyes wide._

_"Clarke... I--,"_

_"Babe who is that?" He hears a soft voice sound from behind her._

_Babe? His heart shattered in his chest. He was too late, he waited too long and he lost her. Not only did he lose her, but he had to leave her too._

_Clarke answers the girl in the back. "One minute Lexa, it's just my best friend."_

_Just my best friend._

_Just my best friend._

_Just._

_"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Lexa, it's still so new and I didn't want to--"_

_"I'm moving." He says abruptly, wanting to leave as soon as possible now to try and push the burning sensation in his heart away._

_"Wh-what?" Clarke asks, her eyes wide._

_"My mom just told me now. We're moving. To California. I'll be gone by the end of the week."_

_The blonde's eyes fill up with tears. "No. No way you're an adult, you're eighteen years old you can stay--"_

_"I can't stay Clarke, I can't leave Octavia."_

_"She isn't a baby anymore Bellamy! You don't have to take care of her anymore!"_

_Bellamy's eyes turned cold. "I will always take care of my sister Clarke. My sister, my responsibility."_

_The tears fall down Clarke's face, and all he wants to do is wrap her in his arms and tell her how much he loves her. Needs her. But he can't. He lost his chance._

_He pulls Clarke into his arms for a brief hug, it's all he can handle right now without wanting to cry._

" _It's okay... we will stay in touch."_

_. . ._

_They didn't._

⋆⋆

"Bellamy?" Monty asks again.

Bellamy snaps out of it and looks up at his friend. "Sorry, uh, I knew a Clarke once but I doubt it's the same person."

Monty nods, "Alright then, let's get in there."

Bellamy clears his throat and follows Monty into the booth, and his heart sinks when he sees her.

Her blonde hair is shorter now, falling just below her collar bones. Her eyes are still as blue as they have always been, wide and curious as they meet his.

She is just as gorgeous as he remembers her, if not more.

"Bellamy? Is that you?" She asks, standing up and crossing the threshold to where he is standing.

"Clarke-" He breathes out before she's wrapping her arms around him in a tight hug.

"Holy shit it's been so long!" She pulls away and slaps his arm hard.

"Ow!"

"Why didn't you text me? Why didn't you call?" She accuses.

"I-"

"The truth please, it may have been a long time since we've last talked but I know when you are lying to me"

Bellamy hesitates before he clears his throat. She can't possibly be able to tell if he lies to her right now. It's not possible. But he will tell her the truth. At least... part of it. There is no way he is going to admit to not being strong enough to talk to her because he loved her too damn much. That is not something he's keen on admitting.

"When we moved, my mom had to cancel our phone bills. We couldn't afford them anymore, and stamps were too damn expensive to go buy to send you letters. I figured that by the time I was able to buy a new phone and get a plan that actually worked, I'd be able to talk to you. But when that happened, and I texted the number I remembered it said it was out of service." He says, putting his hands in his pockets. "So by then, it was kinda pointless to keep trying. I didn't have a way to contact you."

Clarke looks at him wide-eyed. "I'm... sorry."

"It's fine. It's rare for old friends to stay in touch anyway." He brushes off.

Clarke furrows her brow, "Bellamy—,"

"Oh my gosh, he's here!" Harper says after coming back from the bathroom. "You are _handsome, M_ onty why didn't you tell me he was so handsome?"

Monty looks at Clarke, still uncomfortable from hearing the conversation between his two friends. "She been drinking a lot?"

Clarke nods slowly, "Yeah we've been here a while already..." she trails off, unable to keep herself from looking at Bellamy.

He is just as beautiful as she remembers him. Her heart couldn't help but race against her chest being in the same place as him again. It's been so long since she last saw him, but all of those old feelings came rushing to the surface like they were always there.

From the moment he told her she looked beautiful in that dress she tried on for homecoming, she loved him. But she never said a word about it because she knew he would never feel the same way. He was into girls like Roma, Gina, Echo. Everything that she wasn't. Besides, why would he have wanted to be with her when they were friends for so long? That's why she decided to take a page out of his book and go for a leggy brunette in the hopes it would help soothe her aching heart that beat for him.

It didn't work.

And now seeing him here again, standing in front of her with those brown eyes that pull her into a trance whenever they meet her stare, she can't help but let those long-suppressed feelings flood back to the surface.

He broke her heart when he left. He broke her heart when he never called, but here she was willing to give him her heart again in the hopes that maybe this time... maybe he wouldn't break it.

"I'm gonna go dance. Let's go have some fun!" Harper shouts over the loud music, grabbing her boyfriend's hand and leading him to the dance floor.

Clarke clears her throat and turns around towards Bellamy, seeing that he looks just as uncomfortable as she feels. "You wanna dance?" She asks.

Bellamy looks up at her, and his eyes rake over her body. She can tell the moment his eyes darken. She dressed in one of her best dresses, a tight emerald green that clung to all the best parts of her in hopes that whoever Monty was brought tonight was worth the effort. And now seeing her best friend that she was in love with all those years ago, she _hopes_ he is.

"Uh, sure. Yeah."

Clarke grabs his hand and tries to ignore the heat that shoots up her spine at the contact. If the blush on his cheeks is anything to go by, he feels the same way.

Clarke starts to sway her hips along to the beat of the song, lifting her hands slowly over her head, and back down her body in a gentle movement. Bellamy grips onto her hips and starts to move along with her, closing his eyes and letting the music lead him through the complicated mess of feelings he's experiencing right now.

Her arm grips onto his shoulder and his mind takes him to the night they were watching a horror movie, and she grabbed his arm when she got scared.

He moves her hair out of her face, and it takes her back to the time where they went to the fair, and the wind at the top of the ferries wheel messed up her hair so badly, that he pulled it back into a loose braid.

They danced along to the music, and it took them back to the time when they spent hours dancing around Bellamy's living room the first time they ever got drunk, holding onto each other and letting their smiles speak the words they were both too scared to say.

Clarke pulls away abruptly, snapping Bellamy out of his trance. "I- I can't do this. I need to go." She rushes out of the door before he even has a chance to ask her what he did.

_You left her, and you didn't call._

"Fuck. Clarke!" He called after her, as he pushed past the bodies of everyone in the club.

He pushes open the club doors and sees her standing there, with her arms wrapped around herself shivering under the cool breeze.

He shrugs off his jacket, and comes up beside her, draping it over her shoulders. She takes a deep breath and holds tighter onto the jacket, and looks at him.

"You left. You never called. You came to my house and dropped the worst bomb you could ever drop on me and then you just left like I meant nothing to you." She says.

Bellamy shakes his head. "That's not how it was. You meant everything to me."

Clarke scoffs, "Right. So much that you gave up on me."

Bellamy scowls, "I never gave up on you Clarke. I couldn't handle being with you... but not being with you."

She looks at him, confusion lacing her face. "What are you talking about?"

Bellamy shakes his head. "Nothing I just- don't say that you meant nothing to me when you were the only thing that ever mattered."

She takes in a sharp breath at those words. "If that's true then why did you really stop calling? I know that what you said in there was true, but I know there is more to the story than that."

Bellamy nods, a smile crossing his face. "You were always so perceptive."

Clarke looks at him, waiting for him to tell her.

Bellamy signs. "I stopped calling because I was in love with you."

Clarke's eyes widen. "You what?"

"I was in love with you, and I had to be separated from you. I ran to your house in the rain to confess my feelings to you, and tell you I was going to do whatever it took to make things work long-distance. But then you answered the door, and you weren't mine anymore. You were Lexa's and I lost my chance. Like I said before. I couldn't be with you and _not_ be with you."

"Bellamy—"

"You don't have to say anything. I know it's pathetic and it was wrong of me to ignore you because I couldn't handle my feelings for you. I couldn't handle the rejection. I'm sorry Clarke. You were my best friend and I just left you."

Clarke wiped away a stray tear on her face, and looked up at him; determined.

"The first time I realized I loved you was when you bought me that art set, even though you didn't have money for clothes." She confesses.

Bellamy freezes, and she continues.

"The second time; was when you got so mad about Finn, and you wouldn't explain why. I spent hours agonizing over what your issue could have been when all along I loved the way it made me feel. It made me feel like the person I wanted most in this world wanted me back. But then Roma came along, and I had to improvise. Then you told me I looked beautiful in the dress I picked out for you because you always said midnight blue brought out the color of my eyes."

Bellamy looked at her in awe, slowly making his way closer to her.

"Then I knew for a fact that you were it for me when you walked away from me on that doorstep in the rain, and I never heard from you again. I lost everything that day. You say I was the only thing that ever mattered to you, well the only thing that ever mattered to me was taken away from me that day."

Bellamy let out a breath, and in an instant, he was cupping her face and crashing his lips to hers. Clarke felt like she finally had the missing piece of herself, his lips the final piece in her puzzle. She grabbed his wrist and kissed him back with all of the passion that words couldn't express.

Once they parted, he rested his head against hers. "I don't want to let you go again."

Clarke looked up at him from under her lashes and pressed her lips to his once more in a promise.  
"So don't."

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and Comments appreciated !


End file.
